Rule 32.2 As there is a human factor involved in blowing the whistle to stop play, the Referee may deem the play to be stopped slightly prior to..
..the whistle actually being blown. The fact that the puck may come loose or cross the goal line prior to the sound of the whistle has no bearing..
The saga over Dan Carcillo’s mustache continued Tuesday. When the Philadelphia Flyers forward walked into his meeting with NHL Disciplinarian Colin Campbell today, he was greeted with two tables in an otherwise empty office, insiders tell ITB. One table had a can of shaving cream, a razor and a bottle of after shave. On the [...]
After years of pouring through data, conducting tests and performing detailed analysis scientists confirmed Tuesday that despite Wayne Gretzky’s insistence, you do not miss every shot you never take. Ian Fredericks, chief researcher at the National Association of Men’s Bullshit Lie Analyzers (NAMBLA), announced the results of a 10-year study into the study debunking Gretzky’s [...]
NHL Disiplinaration Colin Campbell said Friday head hit victims’ inherent “douchiness” would weigh heavily in decisions to penalize players following controversial hits. Cambell’s statement came hours after the league was faced its first decision in penalizing a player after its controversial head-shot rule went into effect Thursday. Florida Panthers forward David Booth suffered his second [...]
The MSG network spent tens of thousands of dollars to secure special broadcasting equipment, trained dozens of people and painstakingly recorded a 3D broadcast alongside its HD and standard feeds of last night’s Rangers versus Islanders. But Todd Fletcher — the only prick on the planet that has purchased a 3D television set — just [...]
The National Hockey League Players Association announced Tuesday it had rehired Bob Goodenow as its director and is looking towards getting the players locked out for a third time in 2011, which it says would “restore hockey to the obscurity it deserves.” After going through four directors since the 2005 lockout, interim director Mike Ouelett [...]
The Atlanta Thrashers announced Tuesday that all remaining games on the schedule would be played at an Early Bird special start time of 2 PM Eastern. The change comes a week after the club called up greybread defenseman Chris Chelios from the Chicago Wolves. Atlanta general manager Don Waddell said the move was discussed with [...]
NHL superstar Alexander Ovechkin was suspended Monday for two “games” as a result of his hit on Blackhawks defenseman Brian Campbell. Ovechkin will miss road matchups with the Panthers and Hurricanes during his, ahem, “suspension.” “Mr. Ovechkin has been reckless in his play for quite some time now, and it’s time we really dropped the [...]
An epidemic of embarrassed stuttering, smirking and blushing took over the hockey airwaves across North America Tuesday, as male sportscasters were forced to pronounce the name of Grant Clitsome following an excellent NHL debut for the Columbus Blue Jackets. The unfortunately named Clitsome had two assists in his first NHL game Tuesday night, a 4-3 Blue [...]
Embattled Edmonton Oilers’ goaltender Nikolai Khabibulin is in more hot water in Arizona where he is now facing an “Extreme DUI” charge for allegedly using rocketskates to jump across the Grand Canyon while “at least 10 fingers of vodka deep” authorities announced Tuesday. Tuesday’s arrest marks the second time Khabibulin has been arrested in Arizona in [...]
Bonjour my friends. Big news to start off tonight’s column. My gnomes tell me that Team USA star Paul Stastny has demanded a trade from the Colorado Avalanche. What could drive the budding superstar to such a demand? Why, the Olympics themselves. My sources tell me that Stastny was heard berating goalie Craig Anderson for [...]