Rule 32.2 As there is a human factor involved in blowing the whistle to stop play, the Referee may deem the play to be stopped slightly prior to..
..the whistle actually being blown. The fact that the puck may come loose or cross the goal line prior to the sound of the whistle has no bearing..
Oft-injured Vancouver Canucks defenseman Sami Salo will be out indefinitely after tearing in his Achille’s tendon following an argument with the Sedin twins over which video game was better, NHL 95 or NHL 94. Witnesses said Salo was playing a pick up game with the Sedins when the dispute started on the bench during a [...]
BP finally – at least temporarily — halted the oiled leak that has decimated the United States’ southern coast this afternoon, but may have done so at the expense of one of the NHL’s most beloved heads of hair. Philadelphia Flyers forward – famed for his coarse, curly bright red hair – said he woke [...]
The Philadelphia Flyers have received a federal grant to accurately test how long lightning can survive in a bottle by retaining the two journeyman goaltenders that led them to the Stanley Cup finals this year. “Some people argue that this is well-studied, we disagree,” said Flyers General Manager Paul Holmgren. “I know that time and [...]
Dustin Byfuglien broke out of his Stanley Cup slump Sunday night. He didn’t, however, bust out The Buff – his post-goal celebratory dance move that’s sweeping the nation. According to the curiously-named winger (shouldn’t it be By-FOOG-lee-in?), it was spite that kept his right leg planted firmly on the ice. After losing two games in [...]
During our post-game editorial meeting following game two of the Stanley Cup Finals, we watched Chris Pronger steal the game puck for the second straight time, shoot a towel into Ben Eager’s face and then non-chalantly proclaim he had tossed the puck in the trash — and we all began to wonder something. How does [...]
The Philadelphia Flyers have hired a topiarist to try and trim the team’s ridiculously bushy playoff beards into more aerodynamic shapes, after many on the team appeared to be sluggish under the weight of their facial fur to open the Stanley Cup Finals this weekend. “Clearly we’re in some dire straights here,” said Flyers coach [...]
Hours before game 1 of the Stanley Cup Finals Saturday, Blackhawks officials gave their core players a briefing on how to avoid an attack from the dreaded Zombie Chris Pronger. While many believe the Philadelphia Flyers defenseman’s notoriously dirty play simply makes him a leading member of the doucheoisie, he has actually been a zombie [...]
A Philadelphia Flyers fan was Tasered in a New Jersey office building Tuesday morning after his co-worker claimed the man was “bending the laws of douchebaggery” following his team’s triumphant return to the Stanley Cup Finals. Witnesses at Benton and Thompson Accounting in Hamilton, NJ said Jeff Selkers was Tasered by co-worker Tom Daniels shortly [...]
“No fucking way,” Flyers forward Simon Gagne said in disbelief. Eight minutes and 22 seconds into the third period of game 3 of the Philadelphia Flyers game against the Montreal Canadians Thursday night everything changed. The Flyers had scored a goal. And with that, the belief that an away team could actually score, if not [...]
Flyers goaltender Michael Leighton was eaten by a crocodile roaming the halls of the Wachovia Center Saturday morning, the seventeenth goaltender this season to be placed on the injured reserve for the team. Flyers General Manager Paul Holmgren held a press conference and said Leighton’s season was over and he had been placed on the [...]