Rule 32.2 As there is a human factor involved in blowing the whistle to stop play, the Referee may deem the play to be stopped slightly prior to..
..the whistle actually being blown. The fact that the puck may come loose or cross the goal line prior to the sound of the whistle has no bearing..
Flyers defenseman Chris Pronger, in the spirit of the holiday season, has finally divulged the source of his insatiable need to be a giant douchebag on the ice. “I was watching this documentary awhile back called How The Grinch Stole Christmas and it really struck a chord with me,” said Pronger, who ramped up his [...]
The New Jersey Devils announced this morning that they intend to pay a $3 million fine imposed by the NHL by stuffing embattled captain Jamie Langenbrunner in a box and mailing him to NHL headquarters. The Devils – who were fined $3 million and docked two draft picks Monday by the NHL following the summer-long [...]
The New Jersey Devils announced this morning that Ilya Kovalchuk has signed the exact same 17-year $102 million contract that was rejected by the NHL two weeks ago, and are submitting it to the league along with a recently discovered birth certificate that claims the Russian is 23, not 27. “It was our bad really,” [...]
Chicago Blackhawks forward Dustin Byfuglien, responding to mountains of discussion on the pronunciation of his last name during this year’s playoffs, told reporters in a press conference Tuesday that his name is actually pronounced “Smith.” “I just wanted to clear the air. It’s a little known Minnesota dialect,” Byfuglien said. “Where I come from ‘byfug’ makes [...]
Dustin Byfuglien broke out of his Stanley Cup slump Sunday night. He didn’t, however, bust out The Buff – his post-goal celebratory dance move that’s sweeping the nation. According to the curiously-named winger (shouldn’t it be By-FOOG-lee-in?), it was spite that kept his right leg planted firmly on the ice. After losing two games in [...]
During our post-game editorial meeting following game two of the Stanley Cup Finals, we watched Chris Pronger steal the game puck for the second straight time, shoot a towel into Ben Eager’s face and then non-chalantly proclaim he had tossed the puck in the trash — and we all began to wonder something. How does [...]
Hours before game 1 of the Stanley Cup Finals Saturday, Blackhawks officials gave their core players a briefing on how to avoid an attack from the dreaded Zombie Chris Pronger. While many believe the Philadelphia Flyers defenseman’s notoriously dirty play simply makes him a leading member of the doucheoisie, he has actually been a zombie [...]
Former professional wrestler The Goon signed a contract with the Idaho Steelheads of the ECHL Thursday morning. It’s believed the be the second recorded professional-wrestling-to-professional-hockey career move, following Chris “Steel Elbow” Pronger’s infamous loser-leaves-town cage match with Randy Savage in the early 1990s. The brawler from Parts Unknown is expected to join the Steelheads in [...]